On the hydrangeas

the weight of the morning sun

the evening sun


---Otsuyu


garden of red roses
dark, forbidden
climbing trellis and gable

6 comments:

diana l. said...

I think what trips me up here is "forbidden". It's hard for me to get past my concept of a garden of red roses being terribly inviting (especially the scent!) Is there something you can change to better communicate what it was about this scene that suggested it was "forbidden"? (Otherwise, I like the running rose theme you've got going on in these pieces.)

David said...

diana I expect I was thinking insome way of the red roses as a sexual symbol. on a more literal level the garden is out of bounds to me - its someone elses garden. i can see the roses from here.

folds of red petals
glisening with dew
in early light

David

David said...

But that does not really account for the 'trellis' or 'gable' unless this is a vague and indirect reference to a bedroom.

In truth I just love the hard full consonants of 'tre...' and 'gable'

But then again was i thinking of Mrs Trellis from North Wales. This is a reference to one of the funniest radio shows in the UK.'I'm Sorry I haven't a Clue'

David

diana l. said...

Nothing like a little garden-variety (couldn't resist the pun) free association when one is writing haiku!

Carlos Gesmundo said...

For a beautiful rose, I'd climb a trellis and gable ... :)

Interesting verse!

Cassiopeia Rises said...

David I like this very much. Much thanks for your fixing my Haiku.



Melanie